FANDOM


Go Away Or We Will Nuke You
Nuclear Bloc
Nuke the Whales
Signatories

Fark
Fark Flag
Nuclear Knights
Nuclear Knights Flag
World Task Force
World Task Force Flag

Former Signatories
Alpha
Alpha Flag





Treaty Type: Bloc
Treaty Signed: December 6, 2016
Treaty Status: Defunct

Go Away Or We Will Nuke You, informally referred to as the Nuke Bloc, was an MDoAP bloc signed between Alpha, Fark, and Nuclear Knights on December 6, 2016. World Task Force would later join the bloc on June 16, 2017. Their members hold over 1,300 nuclear weapons between them.

Following the Strategic Arms Limitation Talks war, the bloc was disbanded. Fark and World Task Force retained a MDoAP between them. Alpha disbanded and some of their members created Church of Atom. Nuclear Knights became a protectorate of Black Knights.

Preamble

For more than a year, ominous rumors had been privately circulating that high-level Orbis leaders had been at work on what was darkly hinted to be the ultimate weapon: the ability to shitpost the entire planet with impunity. Intelligence sources traced the site of the top secret project to the perpetually fog-shrouded wasteland below Baatopia. What they were building, or why it should be located in such a remote and desolate place, no one could say. It is for this reason that Fark, Alpha, and the Nuclear Knights enter into the following agreement:

Article I

Protecting our vital fluids. It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual, and certainly without any choice. That's the way our hard-core adversaries work. I first became aware of it during the physical act of love...Yes, a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred. Women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, but I do deny them my essence. So it is each of our alliances and nations must protect, yea cherish, our respective sovereignty.

Article II

“Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed. But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops. Uh, depending on the breaks.” Which is why the 3 signatories agree to hash stuff out on their own should an unfortunate launch code be entered.

Article III

In order to guard against surprise nuclear attacks, the 3 signatories will maintain a large force of B-52 bombers airborne 24 hours a day. Each B-52 can deliver a nuclear bomb load of 50 megatons, equal to 16 times the total explosive force of all the bombs and shells used by all the armies in World War II. Also, we'll talk to each other.

Article IV

If this ever happens to any of the 3 signatories: The Duty Officer asked General Ripper to confirm the fact that he *had* issued the go code, and he said, uh, "Yes gentlemen, they are on their way in, and no one can bring them back....” then the other 2 are obligated to come to their defense (or “defence” if you're in a less cultured part of the world).

Article V

References to us being the crazy ones are right up our alley. That being said, if one of the 3 signatories decides to layeth the smacketh down on someone, one of if not both of the others may jump in. Because fark you, that's why.

Article VI

“General Turgidson! When you instituted the human reliability tests, you *assured* me there was *no* possibility of such a thing *ever* occurring!” Buuuut, if the unthinkable DOES happen and we decide not to be a Gang of Lust any more, 72 hours notice is required.

Article VII

The League of Extraordinarily Cocky Twatwaffles That Thinks They Get to Meddle in Other Alliances Affairs sucks, and any of them caught tampering with any of us will be dealt with by all of us.

Signatures

Signed for Alpha

Placentica, Driver
James II, Hybrid

Signed for Fark

Slick Johnson, Head of IA
Kosmokenny, Head of FA/War

Signed for Nuclear Knights

Apeman, Grand Warmaster
Drecq, Warmaster General
K Rudd, Warmaster General
Hayley, Warmaster General

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